Back Street Crawler

Best recited with a Scottish accent…..not that I’m stereotyping or anything.

Think Rab C Nesbitt…….

It all started in the Willow Tree

With some real ale ‘samples’, all for free

 

Asked the Madam in the Hyde Tavern

For a pint of Harvey’s, and chaser of Glencadam

 

Came unstuck in the Mucky Duck

The tab went unpaid, was down on my luck

 

But in the Albion I won the jackpot

Regulars groaned, but bollocks tae that lot

 

Pockets re-fuelled, I mooched to the Railway

Kossoff on the jukie for some wicked fret-play

 

Next it was on to the Fulflood Arms

To leer at that blonde with the alluring charms

 

Called the barman various names

As he propelled me from the St James

 

Rolled down the hill towards the Exchange

Witnessed a bit of pool-table rage

 

Spied some ‘College’ boys in the Wykeham

(Don’tcha sometimes just wanna kick ‘em?)

 

Eyed the barmaid with the curvy hips

Puffing a Benson outside the Eclipse

 

That wedding party at the Bishop on the Bridge?

…..I told the bride I’d take her up the ridge

 

And the Bakers Arms made it a round dozen

As I chucked my cookies over the landlord’s cousin

 

Copyright Jody Redmires, 2016                                                 http://www.jodyredmires.com

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