Edward the Reader

When his web browsing history

Was no longer a mystery

Doctor Ed Du-Freyn

Could hardly complain

 

For a routine IT check

Had revealed a “Best

Escorts in the North” refrain

And an unfamiliar domain

 

The subsequent inquiry

Revealed a virtual library

Of websites of indulgence

Whilst shopping for ‘romance’

 

A leak to the press

Caused untold distress

For Pro Vice-Chancellors

And local councillors

 

A senior line manager

An H.R. advisor

An Independent Panel

And a Union ‘Regional’

 

The University of Respectability

Considered its responsibility

And considered dismissal

To be the best rebuttal

 

Signing-on at Dole House

Queueing behind pan-scouse

Then the lanky security guard

Spoke to him so hard

 

Said his job-seeking ‘coach’

As she filled-in her notes:

“Before we process your claim

What skills do you proclaim?”

 

Said Ed:  “I communicate well”

So they found him hard-sell

“Large Pizza, £6.98!”

(His sandwich-board on Fargate)

 

Now he’s the talk of the town

In the land of the gown

Edward the Reader?

…..……dirty little bleeder

 

Copyright Jody Redmires, 2014

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